so im just sitting in the kitchen with a cup of tea again.
well after midnight.
well annoyed by my relationship status.
well annoyed by my relationships generally.

houseshare.
3 girls and a couple. three withces and a couple.
i know it sounds like a paradise but belive me it sucks big time.
no way im gonna toutch any of them.
for the 3 witches its understandable.
for the taken one i have a crush on is understandable.
(morals.. im still an old fashioned loser. plus her bf is a good guy.)
whats quite unclear is one of the wiches moved out recently and i start to miss her.
but no wonder id still.. ermm.. dislike her if she would be here.
now explain that.

girls "hardly ever say what they mean and constantly contradict themselves"
lightened up my day reading that.
thanks.. alot. :)

yesterday i decided to count how many girls look at me on my way to work. (children and 40+ doesnt count)
i got as far as...
13.
thirteen. depressing.
i travel from hackney to wimbledon for gods sake.
-10 points of self respect.
i mean..
i know i dont look like david beckham or johhny depp
(or fuck knows who is the latest hottes-guy-ever)
and im pretty much fine with it.
but its a stunning revelation. i hope i just had a bad day.
but oh well. counting it shows a serious lack of sanity anyways.

i used to never mind being single. not even the lack of sex.
but now it feels very uncomfortable.
i bet its London. must be something in the air or the water..

i want a farm in ireland. (or fiji. lol selling hot-dogs and doughnuts..)
no joke. i keep thinking about it for years now.
a lack of a few hundred thousand pounds can break dreams.

got an email at 8am. if im avlailable for a job interview today.
i swear theres no sanity left in this world.
1st: its S U N D A Y !
of course i work on sundays but please let me keep that illusion its not right this way and it wont last forever.
2nd: they really think someone is up at 8am on sundays? thats a joke right?
3rd: theres a voice in my head saying.. if they mail you in the morning and expect you to cancel everything for a job interview..
what kind of private life would you have when you work for them?
come on.. i just want a job..  i have no intention to enslave myself.

gahhh.. over 2000 characters again..
take care..